James O'Brien's Mystery Hour

00:02 This is a Global Player original podcast. 00:08 This is LBC from Global. Leading Britain's conversation. Mystery Hour with James O'Brien. 00:16 Three minutes after 12 is the time. Got a bit curtailed conversation. We may try to return to it at some unspecified point in the future. 00:26 Because now it is Mystery Hour. Your weekly opportunity to... I've done all that, haven't I? What haven't I done? Oh, there's a prize. There's a magnificent prize. You can win it, actually, by being my favourite contribution of the week. The management's decision is final, but that's all you have to do. Whether you ring in with a question or an answer, or a complaint. Not a complaint, that was a joke. Whether you went in with a question or an answer, if it is my favourite of the day, my favourite of the week, then it's all yours. You get a Mystery Hour board game, that's the game version one, or you get the Mystery Hour travel game, which is a completely different proposition, and it comes in a tin. 01:02 One is pocket-sized, one is not. But one, either box-sized or pocket-sized, will be yours if you make my favourite contribution of the week. I'll tell you about the terms and conditions in a minute. 01:14 In fact, I'll tell you now. The terms and conditions for the competition are at lbc.co.uk. And the... What's the other thing? Oh, yeah, you can find out more about the game if you want to actually buy one as opposed to cross your fingers and hope that you make the most appreciated contribution of the week. Then you can go to mysteryhour.co.uk. So... 01:34 Phone lines are open. If you have a question that needs an answer, call me now on 0345 60 60 973. If you're brand spanking new to this feature, maybe give yourself five minutes to just get a flavour of the kind of questions that get on the board because some are perhaps a little bit obvious and some wouldn't necessarily get put straight to the switchboard. But generally speaking, it's a who, a why, a when, a where, a whence, a wither, the occasional wherefore, although I don't think anyone's ever rung in and said, James, wherefore are that... Wherefore... 02:09 It just means why, doesn't it, Keith? It's just a fancy way of saying why. So wherefore do we do-do this? So all of that, they're all, what are they called, Keith? Interrogative pronouns. I think that's what it is. 02:25 That's it, really. And the only real thing that you need to bear in the back of your mind is... 02:33 It must have an answer. So don't ring in and ask about the meaning of life or something like that. 42, everyone knows that. It must be something that actually has an answer, something that you feasibly, plausibly believe that you actually have a prospect of getting an answer to your question. In other words, that somebody else listening to this so-called program will be able to provide the answer that you so desperately crave. 02:57 I mean, we used to have rules. I don't really like motoring questions, but frankly, I'm getting old and find it increasingly hard to stick to my carefully cultivated principles on this particular issue. 03:10 What was I thinking about the other day? So I don't do motoring questions and I don't like London-centric stuff. 03:15 But I'm fascinated by you, Les. Absolutely fascinated by it as an emblem, as an example of almost everything that's wrong with British media and elements of British politics. I may explore that another day, but I generally don't like motoring questions. And we don't like repetition, but we've been doing this for so long now that avoiding repetition is frankly impossible. Imagine being a phone-in host who only does the new topics. Every single topic we do, three topics a day, is something that we've never gone anywhere near or done anything like before. We wouldn't last a week. 03:46 We wouldn't last a week. The trick is, of course, to return to familiar territory with fresh eyes and interesting new insights. So, first time for everything. Let's get this up and running. Harry is in Helmsdale. Harry, question or answer? 04:02 Hello, James. I've got a question. Carry on. 04:08 No, he hasn't. I hope he hasn't fallen down a well. 04:10 Are you all right, Harry? Yes, hello. 04:12 Go on, what's your question? What's your question? 04:14 So, I'm currently hiking Landland's John O'Groats. Show off. I've got 60 miles left. How much? You've kept me company, so thank you so much. I've been listening to you every day. 04:24 It's a pleasure. Thank you for keeping me company, although I was unaware of it until this moment. Are you doing it for charity? 04:30 Yes, I'm doing it for Alzheimer's Research UK. 04:33 How can people find out a little bit more about your particular quest today? 04:38 We've got a GoFundMe page or a JustGiving page or something like that? 04:42 He's fallen down a well. We'll get him on with a better... Tell him to climb a tree, Eleanor. There's plenty of trees up. It depends where he is, whether he's near Land's End or John O'Groats, actually. Nigel is in Poulton-le-Field. Filed, Filed, Filed. Question or answer, Nigel? Hello, James. It's a question. What does Filed mean? 04:58 It's the area that's... So are you near Blackpool? Near Blackpool, yeah. Oh, it is Filed. 05:03 So that's where Filed... Yeah, OK. Because we play you at football. 05:07 Yeah, AFC Fylde, which is Kirkham. Fylde is the whole area between Fleetwood and Preston. There you go, you live and learn. What's your question? Question is, how did they record 29th of February, historically? 05:21 And if you go back, if you look at some government websites, they say that it can be recorded as either the 28th or the 1st of March on some official documents. 05:32 What, you mean if it's your birthday or something like that? 05:35 Yeah. Right, okay, yeah. And the reason I ask that is that we always celebrated my grandfather's birthday on the 29th of February, because that's when my mother said he was born. 05:47 No, you've got that wrong. Sorry, I'm correcting you on your own family history, but I think you must mean the 28th of February or the 1st of March. 05:53 We celebrated it on the 1st of March. Yeah, we celebrated it on the 29th. 05:59 And it was after he died, after my mother had died, that I found his birth certificate that said the 1st of March. 06:05 And I thought... Was it really the 29th or did they record it differently? But what is really interesting, because I was alive at the time, was he died on the 29th of February, 1980. Shut the front door. 06:18 Yeah. 06:19 So we think he was both born and died on the 29th of February. 06:23 That's right. 1904. I mean, that must be close to unique, mustn't it? 06:28 Well, it's pretty rare. 06:30 I mean, what are the odds? I mean, you'd have to know how many people there are in the world and then you'd have to divide things by four. 06:37 Twice. Squared. 06:39 Not my strong point maths, Nigel. I can't lie. So obviously it's quite an interesting situation. So what's the question? Did they ever write 29th of February on birth certificates? No. 06:50 Yeah, or did they record them going back to the beginning of last century as the 1st of March? 06:58 I like that. 06:58 I mean, it's quite niche, isn't it? But I like it. Yeah. It could have been that he was just, you know, sort of playing the wagon. It was the first of March, but he thought 29th of February was more interesting. 07:09 I mean, it could have gone in. His mother could have gone into labor, you know, late on the 28th, late on the 29th, and didn't give birth until early on the 1st, but they kind of decided to split the difference. So why wouldn't they put down the 20th? I mean, in the days before computers, it would make more sense to just jot down the 29th. In computers, there might be a kind of millennium bug type scenario where it can't cope with the anomaly. 07:35 Well, it's probably, I mean, as I genuinely say, I've looked, I've done some research. You can find some guidance that says on official documents such as driving licence, they will record it as the 1st of March or the 28th of Feb to avoid complications if it's ever checked. 07:55 Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Well, someone will know, won't they? Because there's bound to be people listening to this who were born on the 29th of February. And they'll be able to tell us straight from the horse's mouth, as it were, what the rules go on. 08:07 Yeah, well, I would hope so. 08:08 But particularly going back 120 years. 08:13 That's what I'm interested in. 08:14 Oh, I see. Whether or not your granddad... So, really, you just want to know whether your granddad really was born on the 29th of February or not. Yeah. But we're not going to be able to answer that. We might be able to say if he had been, they definitely would have written it down because on his birth certificate it said the 1st of March. Oh, crikey. Thank you, Nigel. 0345 6060 973 is the number you need. Let's have another go with Harry who's in Helmsdale. Harry, have you climbed a tree? Yeah, I've just climbed out the well. There we go. And you are raising money for Alzheimer's by hiking from Land's End to John O'Groats. How long have you been hiking? 08:43 I've been hiking for 46 days. 08:45 46 days, 60 miles to go. Are you going to finish it tomorrow, do you think? 08:48 Oh, no, I think three days. 08:51 Just get a flipping rake on, man, will you? Seriously, what are you doing? Crawling? Hopping? 08:56 Oh, there's lots of rocks, James. Lots of rocks. And how can people offer some support for your journey and indeed for Alzheimer's UK? Okay, yes. 09:05 So I have a just giving page, which is Harry M dash Le Jog. 09:10 Oh, nice. Harry M dash Le Jog. 09:12 Yes, but I also have an Instagram and I'm doing daily videos. Go on. And that's Harry M underscore Le Jog. 09:20 Le Jog. 09:21 It is, yes. 09:21 Why did you call it Le Jog? 09:23 Well, Land's End John O'Groats. 09:26 Land's End. Oh, La Jog. 09:28 Le Jog. 09:29 Oh, Land's End. I thought you were doing something a bit French there, mate. I thought you were jogging it with a French flavour and therefore you'd called it Le Jog, you see. 09:42 Like, do van, do pan, do boop. Anyway, Le Jog, that's easy to remember. Land's End to John O'Groats, L-E-J-O-G. So, Harry M, M for mother. Yes. Dash Le Jog. I bet you're wishing you'd never rung in now, aren't you? Anyway, what's the question? 09:56 Okay, yeah, so, I was wondering what are the origins of public rights of way for footpaths? 10:04 As in, why can we walk on some and not on others? 10:06 Yeah, why can we just walk on some person's land and they can't stop you, but... not anywhere else I like that 10:13 There's a story in the news today, actually, I couldn't see a way into it, about a lot of previously sort of casually established rights of way being increasingly closed down by landowners. So what is enshrined in law and what is not? I do not know. There'll be, presumably, there'll be kind of ancient traditions, some of which make it into ordnance survey maps. I don't know why I'm trying to answer this question, Harry. I mean, first of all, you've got a hike to get on with and I haven't got a clue about this. I had a posh friend. 10:44 who fell in love with a girl from a more normal background. You'll like this story, Harry. It'll keep you company for the next five miles. 10:51 And he lived on a country estate, and his old man had a bit of a problem with ramblers who were there legally, but he didn't like having ramblers on his land for the reasons that we're kind of both alluding to, that they had the right to just sort of walk through what he considered to be his garden, but which they considered to be great british countryside and he had he started having a go at some ramblers that he'd encountered on his travels in on his own land and it quickly emerged that they were the parents of the lovely young woman with whom his son had recently fallen in love it was a it was a very romantic moment that came up in the wedding speeches but they all get on famously now uh You're on. 11:35 Why? Why are some rights away, some routes allowed access and others are not? Thank you, Harry. John's in... No, I will come to him after this. 11:44 60 minutes after 12 is the time. Mystery hour is upon us. You are listening to James O'Brien on LBC. And good luck to Harry as he puts in the final... Which way was he going, Keith? Land's End to John O'Groats or John O'Groats to Land's End? It's Land's End to John O'Groats. 60 miles left. If you see him, give him a wave. And maybe, I don't know, a cup of soup or something. What sustains you on a hike like that? It's unlikely I am ever going to find. Or some Kendall mink cake. I don't know what he looks like. He's probably got a thing saying le jog on his back or something like that. And a beard. 12:12 Lewis is in Mason. Lewis, question or answer? 12:14 Question. Are you currently embarked on a multi-hundred mile hike, Lewis? I wish. Why not? I'm at work. I'm at work. Go on then. What's the question? 12:23 Yeah, I'm in my 60s. I sit down to my evening meal with my wife. And on the telly, we have adults... We have adverts, sorry, for pension plans, funeral care, disability aids and wheels. I'm just wondering if a young couple would get the same adverts. Wheels? 12:43 Wheels. 12:44 Oh, wheels. Sorry, last wheels and testament. 12:48 That sort of stuff, yeah. Disability aids, funeral care, pension. So we get all that old stuff. Do a young couple get the same adverts? 12:55 Are you watching normal telly or are you streaming? 12:58 It's normal TV, ITV. ITV? 13:03 ITV, something like that, BBC, anywhere with that. 13:07 I'm just moving into slightly delicate territory now, and I need you to tell me the truth, Lewis. Do you watch GB News? 13:15 No. 13:16 Oh, it's not that. 13:17 Never watched it. 13:18 Never watched that. Well, and it's on the proper telly, so you'd be watching like... 13:22 It's on the proper telly, yeah. 13:23 The Chase or something like that. 13:24 Yeah, so while the Chase is on, I get them kind of adverts come through. 13:31 Well, I mean, late daytime, it's an older audience. Everyone's getting the same advert. You're beginning to take it a bit personally, aren't you? I can tell. 13:39 I am indeed. You're thinking, hang on a minute. 13:42 Hang on a minute. I might have a few miles on the clock, but I'm good for a few more yet. 13:45 Exactly that. Yeah, well, don't worry. Surely a younger couple wouldn't be interested in them kind of adverts. 13:52 No, but they're less likely to be watching telly at that time. 13:58 Well, no, they are for two reasons. 14:00 The main one being that the youngsters don't watch normal telly, Lewis. 14:06 Yeah, you could be right. 14:06 They're watching everything on their devices and streaming, so they're watching it when they want to watch it. So they'll be watching the iPlayer or even the ITV player. They won't be doing what you and me do, which is thinking inside, oh, it's six o'clock, it must be time for Richard Osmond's House of Games. Or if I was with my mum, as I was yesterday, oh, it's five o'clock, we must put the chase on with Bradley. 14:26 Yeah, as I said, normally during the chase. 14:28 The kids don't do it. The kids aren't watching it on normal telly at that time. So all of the adverts are directed at the older consumer, but everybody is seeing the same adverts. 14:39 Yeah. That's true. Otherwise, what do you mean? Yeah, it's just true. 14:45 Yeah, no, I'll take your word for it. I was watching it in a hospital yesterday, full of old people, and it was the same adverts that you described. No, I was visiting Keith. 14:54 It wasn't old people like me. So that's it. I mean, also, how would they do it? How would they know how old you are if you're watching the television? They'd know if you were watching it on your phone, but not if you're watching it on your television. 15:03 No, that's why I was calling you. No, you're safe. 15:06 You're safe. Ask me what my qualifications are. 15:09 What are your qualifications? 15:11 Spring chicken, mate, and I get the same adverts. 15:15 There you go. 15:17 Lovely stuff. And remember, as I bid farewell to Lewis, you can grab that phone line for yourself on 0345 6060973. Any questions? 15:26 Or indeed answers to the two questions that are still on the board. John's in Warrington. John, question or answer? 15:31 Hi, James. I've got a question. It's about ingredients for casseroles. Oh, yeah. What do you want to know? 15:41 Bay leaves. What are the points? I mean, I... 15:45 You put a bay leaf in at the beginning of a recipe or in a casserole, then you add a multitude of different ingredients. Does anybody say, hmm, this is missing a bay leaf? You know, they don't seem to make any difference. So my question is, why do we use them? 16:04 Umami. 16:07 I beg your pardon? 16:08 Umami. 16:10 Iranu. No. 16:11 Umami. 16:14 Yeah, what's that? 16:17 It's the other thing. 16:20 Is it some ethereal thing? 16:23 No, it's the other thing. It's like we know what sweet is and we know what sour is. We know what salty is. 16:31 What's the other one, Keith? Sweet, sour, salt. What's the fourth one? We know there's four. 16:38 Sweet, sour, salt. 16:39 Yeah, what's the other one? 16:43 Oh, come on. 16:45 Sweet sour salt. Sweet sour salt. What's the other one? 16:49 You should see the blank faces looking back at me, John. I don't know what it's like where you are, but this is like being in an aquarium. 16:56 Does that count as umami, bay leaves? Yes. 17:02 And how would you describe the taste, then? 17:07 Well, I just did. 17:10 No, that's just a word. Umami. It's like, it's a savoury, a subtle savoury, like almost like a kind of, I mean, I don't know if you can describe umami. I think that's the kind of point, but it is, your tongue is picking up on that. It's a meaty flavour. It's like a meaty. What's the most umami thing you can think of is might be a twiglet, for example. 17:36 So it's like, I think a Japanese bloke discovered it about 100 years ago. And we got the four, even though you and me can only remember three of them. Sweet, salt, someone will have sent me. Acid. Is it acid? It's not acid. It's savoury. Sweet, salt, bitter. Anyway, marmite. So if you put like a tiny, tiny bit of marmite in your casserole, you'd get a similar effect to a bay leaf. 18:03 Are you saying... It's bitter. Sweet, sour, salt, bitter. 18:09 I'm not convinced. 18:10 What do you mean you're not convinced? It's not a question of being convinced. It's umami. 18:17 It just is. It's just umami. 18:21 If you can't taste the thing... 18:23 He got it from seaweed. He found it in seaweed. 18:26 And it turned out that the tongue responds in a specific way to sweet, sour, salt and bitter. And it responded to this thing that he found in seaweed in a fifth way, in a different way. And that is called umami. And that is what a bay leaf delivers. Even though people had been putting bay leaves in stews for years before anyone knew what umami was or discovered it, the reason why they were doing it, it transpired, was because of umami. 18:54 I'd like a second opinion. 18:55 Yeah, fair enough, actually, mate. I can't really argue with that as it goes. 18:58 I normally get a bit prickly when people... Because with all those ingredients, you know, they'd mask any subtle umami. 19:07 I don't think they would. I think you underestimate how subtle umami can be. 19:12 I mean, I'll tell you what. 19:15 Hand on heart. 19:17 Make a nice ragu from scratch. Maybe not a chilli, because a chilli is probably going to... 19:23 My chilli recipe includes both bay leaves and indeed dark chocolate, which is a bit of a speciality of mine. But you make a top ragu, I reckon I could tell the difference. 19:35 Really? With one bay leaf? 19:37 Yeah. 19:39 It's why I put anchovies in my pasta sauce sometimes as well. 19:44 Well, I do too. Well, that's umami. You know, that's a salt. No, that's a salt. 19:47 It's salt and umami. It's salt and umami. 19:51 So if you made, let's do the experiment, right? You make two bowls of ragu. 19:57 One with a bay leaf and one without. Okay. And then you've got three separate experiments, have you? So you've got two bowls with the bay leaf. 20:07 One bowl with and one bowl without, and then two bowls without the bay leaf. So you've got three separate taste tests. So you wash your mouth out in between each one. You go, yep, they're the same. Yep, they're the same. 20:20 They're the two that are different. And that is the umami one. I reckon I could do it. 20:26 Well, that remains to be seen. It does. 20:29 So indeed does the answer to this question. 20:34 That's all I've got. 20:35 That's all I've got. I think the dark chocolate is a bit umami as well in the chilli, but I'll leave you to experiment with that. What was the question again? Why do we put bay leaves in food? That was it. Why do we put bay leaves in food? 0345 6060 973. We've got a bay tree in our garden, so sometimes I put fresh ones in, and I can never remember. If you're putting a fresh one in, you'd put in more than you would have dried one, wouldn't you? Because the water would be... Yeah. Deborah's in Waltham Forest. Deborah, question or answer? 21:03 Hi, James. I've got a question for you. 21:05 Yes. 21:06 I'd very much like to know why snails and slugs are attracted to beer. I have a problem with them in my garden and can't get rid of them by humane needs. This is unbelievable. This is unbelievable. Oh, okay. Go ahead. 21:23 I know what the answer is to this. 21:25 Are you sure? 21:27 Umami. Umami. 21:29 Oh, no, please. It's umami. 21:31 Let's not go there again. Keith, this is the new osmosis, mate. This is the new osmosis. It's umami. Someone's asked this before. 21:40 Oh, really? The yeasty smell. Back to marmite. We're back to marmite. You see? 21:45 Umami, marmite, twiglets. The yeasty smell reminds the slugs and the snails of rotting organic matter. 21:57 Matter, yeah. 21:59 So it's like, are they called arthropods? 22:04 It's like an umami for arthropods. 22:07 Okay. I think I can accept that. 22:10 That is actually why. I don't know if it's umami or not, but it is about the kind of yeasty recreation of rotting. Because it's not rotting, it's beer. But it smells to a snail. It smells like something rotting. So they climb up the saucer, they fall in the beer, and they die. And they get drunk, basically. Yeah, but they die, don't they? Ultimately. So that is, I think it's umami, but it's definitely rotting matter. 22:37 Can I just mention really, really quickly, about a year ago, I called in with, you know, when you open the show and you say who, what, where, when, how? And I had a who question. My question was, who is helch? Because when I'm going along the motorway and I see Helge on all these bridges, I went to Shoreditch and I saw some fantastic... The American car wash, isn't it? 22:58 The American car wash in Shoreditch. He was all over that. 23:01 Yes, that's the one. But then I heard on the radio that he's passed away. 23:06 He has, indeed. He's a brilliant graffiti artist for people who've got no idea what we're talking about. And you didn't get on. You didn't get on with it? 23:13 I didn't get on, and I was really disappointed because I wanted to really know who it was, but then I heard it on the news like two days ago. 23:20 Would you... He did the give peas a chance thing on the Chalfont Viaduct, as I turned it into helped a chance taken. Would you like me, and don't be shy, no one else is listening, would you like me to fire somebody? 23:34 No, definitely not. Are you sure? A game would be great. 23:37 Well, let's not get carried away. I'm happy to fire someone. I can't give away a game. 23:41 No, I wouldn't ever want that to happen. 23:43 All right. I can't fire anyone anyway. No, no. Do I accept Keith, maybe? All right. I'm going to take a round of applause for that because it's correct. Although the umami angle may be fanciful, Deborah. 23:55 Okay, and I hope your mum's doing well. 23:57 You're very kind, she is. Actually, now that you mention it, a special shout out to everyone on the cardiology ward, this time at Redditch Hospital. She is in the wars, but she is being extremely well looked after, for which we are all inexpressibly grateful. Thank you, Deborah. Josh is in Hackney. Josh, question or answer? 24:18 I've got a question. Carry on. I would like to know why Heinz baked bean tins don't stack. 24:25 They do stack. 24:27 Well, every brand of tin, so like soup or different supermarkets, they all kind of interlock. 24:34 And Heinz beans don't. They just sit on top of each other. They kind of fall. Really? Yeah, 100%. I've started to doubt myself, so I got some out of the cupboard. Just to double check. 24:45 I think they did once... 24:48 Well, so they don't stack with each other or with other brands. 24:54 Now, some tinned foods are cooked in the tin. 24:59 And others are not. 25:03 I don't mean you cook them in the tin. I mean the manufacturer cooks them in the tin. They're cooked in the tin and the tin is then sealed. 25:11 So it could be that you are looking at different manufacturing processes here, but then you're going to point out that some home brand beans do stack, aren't you? 25:23 I don't have any home brand beans. God, thank the Lord, man. 25:26 Honestly, there's some money-saving things no one should be forced to. 25:32 But every tin I have, they almost interlock. They kind of sit into each other. 25:37 And you could probably stack four, five, six, and it'd be safe. No, I know what a stacking tin means. 25:41 I don't need a diagram. But the Heinz beans do not stack. It's going to have something to do with the manufacturing process, but I know what it isn't. 25:51 Okay. 25:52 Umami. 25:53 Exactly. It's on the board. Why don't Heinz beans tins, Heinz beans, Heinz means beans, Amelia Cox has your headlines. 26:03 33 minutes after 12. We didn't give John in Warrington the credit he deserves for coming back with Iranu, did we? When I said Umami and he went Iranu. That's a Vic Reeves reference. I had it bubbling in the back of my mind, but I needed you to remind me. What was the other one we used to do? Moon Jaro. So I can't remember what the... What was the other one they used to do, Vic and Bob? They'd do Iranu. And then there were two... Anyway, that's why John in Warrington is a genius and is currently, despite stiff competition, probably... That's between him and Harry, I guess, in the lead for the game. 26:39 There are currently two phone lines free, which means you have got room for your own question, 0345 6060973, or your answer to the question about... 26:48 The historical origins of rights of way, why you're allowed to walk on some private land or walk through some private land and not allowed to walk through other private land. And the 29th of February, does it appear? Did it used to appear? Has it ever appeared on official documents? Or have you always been on a birth certificate in particular, particularly one from 1908? 27:10 Was it 1908? 27:11 But anyway, 1906, more likely, if it's a leap year. Anyway, you are more likely to be encouraged to put down March the 1st. If so, why? Guys, a lot of Vic and Bob fans out there. You'd hope so. I'm getting distracted by my messages. Keith, you're right. Allow me just to turn that off. 27:30 So we've got the 29th of February question, and then we've got the bay leaf question, which inexplicably, John wasn't happy with my answer, even though umami is almost certainly the answer. And then I answered the last one. So we're good to go. All right. 03456060973. Joe's in Romford. Joe, question or answer? 27:52 You're telling me, mate. You're not coming to this new, are you? 27:57 It's going to seem that I'm being rude now, but I'm not. 28:05 The phone line's awful, so I'm going to try and fix the phone line and then come back to you. And unfortunately, if you'd wasted less time critiquing my waffle, we might have been able to get the question on the board quicker. Alternatively, if I'd spent less time waffling. 28:18 then we would have already known what your question is before your phone line went south. David's in West Derby in Liverpool. David, question or answer? It's a question, James. Carry on, David. It's a cat question. Oh, yes. 28:30 OK. My cat has just sat on an oblong piece of paper. Oh, not a mat. 28:37 Not a mat. An oblong piece of paper, white. And every time we put down a sheet of paper, the cat sits on it. Now, I watched YouTube the other day, and a lady made a square on the floor out of tape, and the cat sat in the square. 28:55 Why'd the cat like sitting on square pieces of paper or... 29:00 squares made out of tape. 29:03 Didn't we do this quite recently? Am I the only one paying attention? Obviously, you weren't listening. It's all right. It's not your fault. It's not either I've had a sort of weird dream about this or I'm getting deja vu. Didn't we do this quite recently? Don't be having weird dreams about me, James, please. No, I wouldn't, actually. But maybe your cat. I think your cat. Well, did we do it and not get an answer? Or is anyone listening? I mean, not... I don't mean... No one cares or no one knows. What? All right, so why do cats sit on squares? 29:33 White squares or squares made out of tape on the floor. So that would be, the inside of that square would just be normal floor? 29:41 Basically, yeah, and also the thing it sat on as we speak was a drawing done by my grandchild yesterday on a large piece of paper, oblong, and it sits on that. Every time you put a newspaper down, it sits on that. It's not the paper because the ladies proved that by just just drawing on the floor and then the cat comes in and sits on that sits on that. Yeah. Yeah, you're on. 30:06 All right, I like it. Good man. We'll try and find out. I mean, if we haven't done it recently, then I've gone a bit bonkers. Or if we perhaps got the question on the board and didn't get an answer, that would explain why I can't remember it. I like that. David, take care. 12.37 is the time. Let's go back to Joe. Right, with no more beating about the bush, Joe's in Romford. Joe, question or answer? 30:24 I'm not going to be around anybody. 30:26 Get on with it. 30:27 Get on with it, Joe. I've got a question I've been meaning to ask you for years. Go on, then. 30:32 Because he knows so much. I was wondering, can it be identified? 30:42 Can you tell somebody has a good singing voice from their normal voice? 30:50 What was that noise in the background then? 30:52 My dog. Oh, okay. 30:54 I think your dog was answering. 30:55 Your dog was going, yes! 30:57 No, hold on. 31:00 You get on my nerves, James. So can you tell? 31:03 Can you tell a good singing voice from a good talking voice? And your dog went, yes. 31:07 No. Yes, he did. Just answer the question. 31:12 I can't answer it, you cheeky man. I can't answer it at all, but someone else might be able to. Can I ask you whether you have? OK, hang on. Say some more words to me. 31:22 Hello, James. How are you? 31:25 I don't think you have a very good singing voice. 31:28 I used to. The problem is I'm hitting 70 now, so the voice is gone. 31:33 That's all right. I think you probably... I can't. I don't know. All right. Do you think I've got a good singing voice? 31:40 Nah. 31:40 Okay, right. I think you're a bathroom singer. 31:43 Well, it's not even that, really. But, I mean, you'd be quite rude about me anyway. I don't think you would have said something nice about me, even if you thought it was true. 31:50 James, I think you're brilliant. There we go. 31:52 Give him a board game. 31:53 Broadcaster of the year. 31:57 Yes, the best broadcaster on LBC at the moment. 32:00 Absolutely. Good man. 32:02 Can you tell from someone's speaking voice whether or not they have a good singing voice? I have no idea. 0345 6060973. Joe, stay safe. Tristan's in Guildford. Tristan, question or answer? 32:12 Hello, James. I have an answer to it. 32:15 Carry on. 32:16 So it's about the bay leaf question and also a bit on the umami stuff as well. Oh, yes. Okay, so bay leaf is actually just a culinary herb. It's not actually anything to do with umami. 32:28 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Umami is part of the taste it creates. Like seaweed kelp is just kelp, but it's still got umami. 32:40 I don't necessarily totally agree with that. 32:42 You can't disagree with it. That's how umami was discovered in kelp. 32:46 Oh, no, no, of course. No, you're right about that. But I wouldn't say a bay leaf derives from the flavour of umami. It delivers the flavour. 32:54 It delivers some mild umami when in a broth or a soup. I think it does. But we don't have to agree with that. 33:00 A little bit of mild umami. 33:01 Yeah, mild umami. 33:04 But yeah, it's used as a culinary herb, just like rosemary, thyme. You normally chuck it in a slow-cooked dish, because basically the flavour and the oils in the leaf anchor out once you've cooked it for a long time. If you've ever gotten a leaf from a tree outside, you said you've got one at home. You just take a leaf and crush it and rub it in your hands. It'll release all those oils, and that's basically what you're going to get in your food. 33:29 Like rosemary or something like that, it's delicious, isn't it? Yeah, of course. 33:35 What am I talking about? The umami bit. Yeah. Or rather, the question was contingent upon the idea that if you didn't use it, you wouldn't be able to tell. 33:46 As in you wouldn't be able to tell if you didn't use... Yeah, so David doesn't think... 33:50 I think it was David. Was it David or was it... It was John in Warrington. He doesn't think that there's any point to it because he can never really identify whether it's there or not. 33:58 Well, how long is he cooking his food for? That's what I'd ask. 34:00 Well, I mean, what would it deliver, though? Because I need you to... Because I think there's only really one word that can describe what it delivers. 34:07 Yeah, so, I mean, it creates that kind of, like, woody... Meaty, yeasty... Yeah. Umami. Not umami. 34:14 It is umami. It's... 34:20 Is it sweet? 34:22 No, it's not. Is it sour? It's earthy. 34:25 Is it sour? No, it's not sour. Is it salty? 34:28 No, it's not salty. 34:29 Is it bitter? 34:31 Yes, slightly bitter. No, it's not bitter. 34:35 No, you did not get me there. 34:37 It's not bitter, it's not salty, it's not sour, it's not sweet, but it is a flavour. 34:42 The flavour, yeah. 34:43 If only there were a name for the fifth flavour. If only there were a name for the fifth flavour that was only discovered in 1908 by a Japanese scientist. 34:51 Exactly. But you can get umami flavorings mostly, well, from things like aged foods like parmesan, certain tomatoes, shiitake mushrooms, and all of those kind of bits and bobs. 35:04 Dried mushrooms, even more umami than... Is it truffle? Is it truffle umami? 35:09 Yeah, truffle would be considered as a type of umami, yeah. 35:12 I love it. Qualifications? 35:14 So I've worked in food for a long time, and I run a social media content business that creates recipe videos. 35:19 Sensational. Well, I mean, we're going to agree to disagree about umami and bailey, aren't we? 35:24 Well, I'll cook you a dinner sometime, and then you can try it. 35:27 Cook me two, actually, and then one with a bailey from one without. 35:30 Exactly. You can take one to work with you. 35:33 Round of applause for Tristan. Lovely stuff. Take care. 12.43 is the time. Ross is in Dundee. Ross, question or answer? 35:41 I've got a question, please. Carry on. 35:43 Why do all revolving doors turn anti-clockwise? 35:49 What? 35:50 Yeah, a revolving door is when you walk up to them. 35:53 Now, I know what a revolving door is. Hang on. Let me picture it. I'm walking up to it. It doesn't. That's clockwise. No. It goes that way. Yeah. Okay. Carry on. 36:03 So, they all go anti-clockwise. Now, I have to admit... Well, they have to go anti-clockwise because you push them. 36:08 You don't pull them. 36:10 But you can push them the other side. So, yeah, but we're all... I mean, it's biased to right-handed people. 36:17 Well, actually, do you know what? I have to confess that before I was an avid listener to your show... 36:23 I checked online, okay, but the internet gave me wrong information, which is why I'm phoning today. 36:28 Stranger things have happened, but I think obviously it has to go with the direction that the door user is pushing, and because we're about 80% right-handed, or more in fact, I think it might be 90%, it's going to go to the right because you're going to push with your right hand. no i would push it with my left hand because you go and you go into the right hand side right you go into the right hand side you push it with your left hand well all right then the bias the right-handed bias is leaning you towards the right hand side and you'll push whatever's in front of you regardless of what hand you're going to push it with 36:57 I don't think that's right. All right, what's your theory then? Well, somebody said it was to do with the side of the road that you drive on, and it's different in every country, but that can't be right because that's not right for the UK. 37:07 I think that all revolving doors are going to go the way that you've described, aren't they? Yeah, they'll fight. 37:14 Well, because we're 90% right-handed. 37:18 You might have answered it, but are you an expert on revolving doors? 37:26 No, I'm not. I can't even begin to pretend that I'm an expert on revolving doors. I've been through a few. 37:31 Yeah, I've been through a few. 37:32 But I can't lay claim to any form of expertise. No. 37:37 So I'll put it on the board. 37:39 I'll put it on the board. If it's not that, I'll be very interested in the answer. And if it is that, I'll be very smug about having already provided it. Ross, thank you. 37:47 It's 12.45. 37:49 It's always the ones you least expect, isn't it? That revolving door question is causing all sorts of rumpus. 37:56 And I just need to clarify something. We're talking about putting bay leaves in your casserole, not bay leaves. So whatever you do, do not put bay leaves, the sort of creamy whiskey liqueur. Don't put that in anything that is savory. And certainly don't message me to tell me the things that you have put bay leaves in that were massively improved by the present. So bay leaves, two words, bay leaf, not bay leaves, putting bay leaves in your chilli cart, for goodness sake. 38:23 Russ is in Bangor. Russ, question or answer? It's an answer. Carry on. 38:27 It's the advertising on the television. Oh, yes. 38:30 It depends. I'm going to give you the historical answer and I'll give you what's happening now. I'll give you the now actually first. The now is that your TV is watching you. So when you buy a new TV, there's a screen you get that says, do you agree to all of this? And none of us read it. But what it means is it then uses technology to see what you're watching. Quite literally, it's taking screenshots of your screen as you're watching telly and building up a pattern of who you are. 38:55 Same with lots of other technologies these days if you haven't read the terms and conditions. 39:00 Yeah, so it's called automatic content recognition. So it knows when you're watching the football and it knows when you're watching The Price is Right or whatever it is that you're watching. And then it serves ads based on that. Historically, though, which I think was where you thought the answer was... 39:14 So different people watching the same programme are going to have different commercial breaks on terrestrial television? 39:19 Yes. 39:21 Shut the front door. Shut the front door, yeah. It's called automatic content recognition. You can go and Google it afterwards if you want. 39:27 I don't doubt you. I haven't asked what your qualifications are yet. If you turn out to be an ice cream man, then we might have to have words. I'm an ice cream man. 39:33 How did you know I was an ice cream man? 39:34 I'll be watching two people watching the same programme on terrestrial television stations. They're going to have different adverts. 39:41 On a modern television. That's the bit. So if you've got one of these TVs where you've had to give... permission at the start yeah before you even when you set it up i can play game i can play xbox on my telly so i've obviously got all of that so even in the same house two people in the same house with two televisions watching the same program could get different commercial breaks no no why not that's the same tv on the same ip address ip address crucial point carry on okay so historically though it wasn't about time which you thought it was it was about the type of tv you were watching And so when they served football in history, so when they served football on old TVs in the old days, when you've got an aerial on top of your house, they were making guesstimates. 40:22 They were saying, well, people watching football are probably going to drink lager or they're probably going to go and bet. And that's how they did it. They based it on the TV show you're watching. 40:30 Yeah, no, I get it. I mean, it was a little bit more nuanced than that, wasn't it? It wouldn't always be tailor-made, but that would be the general drive. 40:37 It was a guesstimate, but in that case, it was everybody watching football got the same ads. 40:42 And then you've also got, if you're watching daytime television on what we used to call satellite channels, it's quite cheap to get adverts there. So you'll get adverts for quite, you know, small outfits and operations or people selling, like, you know, military... 40:55 coins or something i use my my friend used to watch a lot of rubbish and when i went around to see him he uh he would be watching adverts for like gold bullion and things like that and that's just because it's quite cheap at that time of day and the audience is likely to be older although you know the plates with cats on or like the plates when the royals do that kind of thing yeah that kind of thing exactly and you find them on the back page of the radio times yes 41:19 That's a lot of money. That's a serious spend. 41:23 That's one of the most expensive places you could place an ad. The back of the Radio Times. So they're not necessarily... 41:27 I was thinking more of a local travel agent that somehow pops up on the cricket on Sky News. And it's localised as well. 41:34 Yeah. A bit about the ads. So he won't only get a funeral parlour. He might get Dave's funeral parlour in his town on his telly now. 41:41 So Lewis is getting adverts that sadly think he's older than he thinks he is. 41:48 Yeah, or he didn't read the terms and conditions when he set his telly off. There it is. There it is. 41:55 I mean, I believe you, but I don't believe you. Do you know what I mean? 41:59 Yeah, it's up to you. Well, I believe you because you sound very convincing, and I'll ask you what your qualifications are. 42:06 I'm a marketing consultant, global one, actually, if I wanted to be really big about it. There you go. 42:10 I've been doing it for 18 years. 42:13 And so I believe you, but I can't believe that if the neighbours are watching the same programme as me, they can get different adverts on normal ITV. 42:21 Best thing to do is get one of your kids or somebody to stand between the two houses and watch the same show and wait for the advert to come on. 42:27 How many people knew that? Hands up. Everyone listening. Put your hand up now. 42:31 It's called Automatic Content Recognition and it's going to get more precise. You live and learn, eh? So he's literally watching him. Yeah? 42:39 No, I get it. I get it. 42:40 Yeah. 42:40 Round of applause for Ross. 42:43 And making all of these decisions, not just about adverts. I mentioned it the other day. My friend Alexis Conran has written a brilliant substack about this. He's fascinated by it, or used to do the real hustle on the telly, looking into sort of more obvious scams and hustles. But this is just an interesting modern development that Russ has nailed down perfectly. There you go. Flippin' heck, Lewis. Bad news, really, for you. Ray's in Orpington. Ray, question or answer? 43:08 Oh, Sir James, I mean, someone who could tell a good singing voice was Giacchino Rossini, who was the composer of William Tell, and Figaro, Figaro, Figaro, Barbara of Seville, born in Pizarro in Italy in 1792, officially on the 29th of February. Wow. 43:34 I don't know why you got a round of applause there, but I mean... 43:36 I didn't deliver him, you know. 43:39 But do we know, was that on his birth certificate? 43:41 Yes, yes. Well, I mean, I've always known that it was the 29th of February. Any biography of him straight away says born on the 29th of February. And there was one... a kid's music book where they said, you know, he only had so many birthdays, because unfortunately for him, he was born on the 29th of February. 43:57 But I don't know if this helps us establish whether or not Nigel's grandad in 1906 was born on the 1st of March or the 19th of February, 29th of February. 44:04 There I can't help you, I don't go back that far. 44:08 Well, have another round of applause anyway. But also, you're a bit of a music buff, I sense. 44:15 Yeah. Do you know whether or not you can tell whether or not someone has a good singing voice from their speaking voice? 44:20 I don't know. I always think it's odd. I mean, it always fascinates me, the accent thing. You know, how people usually, unless it's something like the Proclaimers... or British people trying to sound American. When you sing, you can't tell the accent. Someone will have a broad Scottish or Irish accent, but you can't tell that necessarily unless it's deliberate. 44:39 Yeah, like you say, the Proclaimers are a really good example. Mike Skinner as well, the streets. Because around when he broke through, most rappers and hip-hop artists were all trying to sound American, and he didn't. He didn't make any effort whatsoever to sound anything other than exactly who he is. But lovely stuff, Ray. I'll leave it on the board. 44:56 I loved that, as when I was a kid, the William Tell Overture. I would have struggled to remember who it was by, but though... What did it go on? Was it The Lone Ranger? That's right, The Lone Ranger. 45:05 And also, also, appropriately, William Tell on television, the series with Conrad Phillips. They even set words to it. Come away, come away with William Tell. Come away to the land he loves so well. 45:15 A bit before my time, that. 45:18 You can still get it on DVD. Oh, there you go. I like it. 45:21 I love the Lone Ranger, though. Thank you, Ray. Brian's in Wigan. Brian, question or answer? Answer, please, James. I think I know which one it is, if you're in Wigan. Yep. Go on. 45:32 Pines employee for 32 years. 45:36 32 years? 32 years. 45:38 Wow. 45:38 Yeah. 45:39 Just up the road. 45:40 I've retired now. 45:41 Okay. 45:42 All night shifts as well. 45:44 Anyway, to get back to the cans, the reason the cans are not stacking and they very often fall over is because the bottom of the can and what we call the body of the can is one piece unlike the lid or the top. 46:04 Originally, they were three-piece, two ends and a body. 46:08 Then, years and years ago, when I was there, They decided to change the baby food line over to make it a two-piece can. Right. And that did away with the weld in the centre. 46:20 So it saved a few quid, did it? 46:21 Well, it's not just that. They wanted to get rid of any lead or anything that could penetrate the product. 46:28 Right. 46:28 But eventually, the whole setup became two-piece. 46:33 And there was a problem in the production line because they were forever falling over on the conveyors, these cans. 46:40 Yeah. Yeah. 46:40 Because of this round edge, if you look at the bottom of the can, it's not square like the top. 46:47 No, is it bevelled? Is the word bevelled? 46:50 Well, it's like a bevel, yeah. It's a bit like a bevel. 46:52 So what they did, they put like a twister involved that turned the cans over before they hit the conveyor, which eradicated that problem. 47:00 It's a straight... I mean, what was the feeling at work at the time? Because everyone likes to stack their cans, and you can't stack them. 47:06 Well, they do, yeah. I mean, if they're in a... 47:10 In a pack, you just put the pack. 47:12 That's true. 47:13 And just stack on the pack sort of thing. 47:14 Yeah, because it's in the cardboard now, isn't it? It's in the cardboard. Yeah, so you put four on four or whatever. 47:19 That was the problem. And then they brought the ring pull out as well. That was a bit of a problem. 47:24 Does that make stacking not impossible? You can stack some ring pull. I think I stacked my tuner. 47:28 Well, you can stack them now because, like I said, they're normally upside down going through the system and then they turn back again at the end. 47:38 Because that's where you've got your production cord on the top, so you can actually tell the actual minute the can was filled. 47:45 This is lovely. 47:46 This is great. 47:47 Qualifications? 32 years on the job. 32 years, flipping. How hard was it to adjust your body clock when you came off 32 years doing night? 47:55 Well, I never really got into a body clock. What, you did it for 32 years? Three, four days on the night shift, and then you come off with a couple of days on normal hours. 48:05 Yeah. 48:05 Then you go back again, so you never really had a body clock. Still not got one. I've been gone 15 years now. 48:10 Yeah, but you're sounding very well on it, Brian. 48:12 Yeah, I'm doing well. 48:14 Did you get a good staff discount? 48:16 We did at the beginning. It was unbelievable at the beginning. A penny a can, baby foods. That was back in 79, that. 48:24 Good Lord. 48:25 And then there was a great cry when they went up to 2p. Everybody said it was a 100% increase, and it was ridiculous. 48:32 What was it when you left? 48:34 When I left, I think they were about 10p. That's not bad, is it? 48:38 That's not bad. Do you get any benefits as a pensioner, as a Heinz pensioner? Is there any special benefits for you? 48:44 Well, you get the option of going back to the shop when you can. You can go into the factory shop. 48:49 There you go. That's one of my favourite answers in a long time. I very rarely get anyone quite as qualified as you, Brian. 48:56 They went to Kansas past my eyes, James, over the years. It must be phenomenal. 49:01 Billions. 49:02 Billions, literally billions. 49:04 There it is. I've almost certainly eaten a can that you would have handled. 49:08 I'll be honest with you, after the first shift, my eyes closed when I got in bed and I could not get them cans out of my eyes. 49:14 I can believe you. It's unbelievable. Again and again and again, just going off. 49:17 I'll do it all again, I'll be honest. 49:20 Great camaraderie as well. 49:22 On a production line, great camaraderie, I think. 49:25 It was brilliant. It was a pleasure. 49:27 Lovely stuff. Thank you, Brian. You've ended off a really enjoyable show in absolutely cracking fashion. If you missed any of it, you can listen. Oh, hang on. 49:36 Oh, no. I've got to pick a winner now. 49:39 It's got to be Brian. It's got to be Brian, hasn't it? 49:42 If he wants it, if he doesn't want it, give it to someone else. 49:46 If you missed any of today's show, you can listen back on our free Global Player app or the LBC app, where you can also stay up to date with all the latest news videos and opinions. Range of podcasts, James O'Brien Daily, best bits from my show every day. LBC app, free, App Store, now. Swarbrick, four. Now, Fogarty. 50:03 This has been a Global Player original production.